Are you making progress
Are you making progress in your life, in your business in the way that you wanted to? In the way you thought that you would? Or are you not quite where you’d hoped you’d be?
Or, alternatively, maybe you’ve made so much progress, you don’t even quite know how you did it.
One of the tendencies I see in this modern world is that goal setting and driving ambition towards those goals is really almost a given when it comes to being an adult adult in the modern world. But the biggest question I have here is:
Where does this lead us to?
Do we ultimately achieve all the things that we set our minds to, that we pour our energy into, that we put our focus into? And if we do, when we achieve them, when we reach them, what do they bring to our lives?
I recently watched an interview with David Letterman, and Will Smith, which was actually recorded before the controversial Academy Awards. And in that interview, Will Smith said that he had lived most of his life by a rule, which basically said that if you are only giving 99%, to something it as good as giving zero. And if you’re only going to bring 99%, to something, you might as well stay at home.
99% is the same as Zero
He had picked up this kind of work ethic from his childhood, and he had passed that on to his children.
He was an extremely ambitious or is extremely ambitious person and literally climbed up the ranks to becoming one of the most popular actors in Hollywood.
In this interview, he actually admitted that all the material success or the fame, or the competitiveness that he’d applied to his career in life, had ultimately not brought him the happiness that he thought that it would.
In therapy, he, the therapist had actually said to him that mathematically, 99% is about as far away as what you could get from zero. And it was almost like the first time in his life that he recognized that that was actually true.
This driving, and pushing his children to achieve in the way that he has, has ultimately led them to a place of, you know, I have everything pretty much that I’ve ever wanted, but something is still missing in my life.
Maybe I am biased in this particular area. But it feels to me as if this is a very common theme.
From the outside looking in, it’s so easy for us to think: “Wow, if I had that much fame, if I had that much money, and if I had that much success in my life, then I would have everything, I would feel fulfilled, I would feel this happiness”.
But it appears that so many people in these positions are actually stepping out and saying, Well, actually it doesn’t. It doesn’t lead you where you think it’s going to lead you.
So I go back to the first question that I asked at the beginning beginning of this:
Are you making progress in the way that you thought you would, in the way that you feel you should, in the way that you at some level feel that you deserve?
And if you have, are you feeling fulfilled? Do you feel this deep happiness, contentment and this sense of I’m in the right place doing the right things, and I couldn’t be happier?
Or do you still feel like something’s missing?
And if you haven’t made the progress that you thought you would, do you spend your time wondering what you’ve done wrong, or why you haven’t reached this material success that everyone else seems to be reaching?
One of the things that I’ve noticed in my own life is that I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum.
I’ve been on one end where I reached achieved so much financial success and so much happiness in my life. But it wasn’t from a place of trying to become materially successful, it was more from a place of just doing absolutely what I love to do, and focusing on that, and allowing things around me to unfold in the most amazing ways, ways that I couldn’t possibly even have imagined before I started out.
In actual fact, I set clear distinctions that I never wanted to be wealthy. Because growing up, I spent time around really wealthy people. And I just really did not like what I saw, I saw so much unhappiness, broken marriages, addictions to alcohol and other substances. Children that wouldn’t speak to their parents.
And when I looked at this:
I found this association with financial wealth equaling unhappiness.
And maybe that’s was an amazing benefit to me in my life, because I set a head on my path in life, saying, I just really want to be happy. I would like to have food in my stomach and a roof over my head. But I don’t really care about becoming rich. And ultimately, I did anyway, because I think that I focused on things and really brought so much joy into my life, and my life felt pretty amazing.
I’ve been on the other end of the spectrum too. When we emigrated to Australia, there was this really challenging thing that I had to face where my desire for a sense of security pushed me to do things not from a place of happiness, but from a place of, I need to feel a sense of security. And ultimately, money has flowed in, and I have really a lot of wealth compared to the rest of the world. But there’s this massive missing piece for me, which is that sense of deeper connection to what I absolutely love to do. And this is really what put me down the path of, of following my heart, again, from following what I what I love to do.
Falling in love with life and what I’m here to offer.
We can get so trapped into taking actions from a place of pressure, “I need to do this, I have to do this, I need money in the bank account, to show me that I’ve reached a level of success”. We are so surrounded by this in the media, this sense of attaching money in the bank account to success.
The more I’ve investigated what success means to me, Yes, money is involved, but it’s such a bigger picture than that. There’s this feeling inside of me that is indescribable. And it’s unrelatable to how many dollar are in my bank account, the two are not connected.
I can give myself such a hard time for not being where I think I should be, not achieving the progress that I thought I would. This blind ambition and the striving to reach monetary success can really overshadow the bigger picture of success. We can descend into darkness, into depression, into self loathing and the self hatred because we are only measuring success by one criteria instead of looking at the bigger picture.
What I’d encourage you to do, if you find yourself in the situation of either having made so much progress, but still not feeling connected to their deepest sense of fulfillment and happiness, or the other end of the spectrum where you haven’t made the progress that you thought you wanted, and you’re beating yourself up over that, with whichever place you’re in.
Bring spaciousness into your life
I would love for you to take some time to create pauses and gaps and spaciousness throughout your day. To really revel in opportunities to pause. We get so caught up in the busyness and the striving and the taking action and the goal setting and the achieving that we forget to step back, to take a breath to contemplate where we are in life, who we are as individuals, and how the things we’re doing in life connects to the deepness of our soul to this level of integrity, that just lights us up and makes us feel alive as a being.
When we pause, when we take a moment to really contemplate our lives, rather than just chasing after them, you will be amazed at the hidden gems that lie in all these little moments throughout our day.
I’m going to give you a practical example, something that I’ve been practicing myself over the last couple of weeks.
I have a lot of focus in my design, and when I start focusing on something, I love to just be totally absorbed in that thing, and when I get interrupted, it’s really aggravating for me, and it feels as if something’s been done to me, and I have this tendency to react in a not so pleasant way.
I recently heard something from Richard Rudd, who is the founder of Gene Keys. He was talking about unexpected pauses. Ultimately, it’s, when you’re in the middle of doing something, and somebody comes and interrupts you.
This is an unexpected pause.
Rather than getting upset by the fact that you’ve been interrupted, you enjoy the fact that the universe has brought you an opportunity to take a pause.
By shifting your perspective, in this way, oh, my goodness, it makes a massive difference to how you feel on the inside, how you interact with other humans.
Overall, your day improves in the most amazing way.
When I’m deeply focused, I’m doing a lot of studying of human design, and I love to delve into the details, and I’m bringing my focus and my enthusiasm, and my ability to go into the deep, into the depth of things. When somebody calls out to me to ask me a question or ask for my feedback on my input on something, instead of getting upset that I’ve broken, my my train of thought, my deep concentration and focus has been broken, I allow myself to feel excited by the opportunity that the universe has just given me to create a pause, and I stop.
I allow my focus to shift to whoever the person is that brought that unexpected pause into my life. My ability to be present with that person, and the exchange of energy between me and that other being in that moment is beautiful.
It’s such a contrast to when I feel aggravated by the interruption.
So what I’d encourage you to do over the coming weeks is to watch for unexpected pauses. These can come in so many different places.
When you’re in traffic, or you’re driving somewhere and you’re in a hurry, and every traffic light that you go through, is red. See these as unexpected pauses, opportunities to take a few breaths to center yourself, to focus on how you intend to show up when you reach your meeting point. And you never know there may be an accident that happens just in front of you. And if you’d rushed through every single light and they’d been green, you may have ended up in that accident. You don’t actually know why these unexpected pauses show up in your life. So rather than needing to know or feeling aggravated by them, just revel in them and take that moment to breathe, to connect to your soul energy and move through life from this really empowered and beautiful place.
The more spaciousness, and the more pauses you bring into your life, the more of this contemplative energy, I feel like the progress that needs to happen in your life will happen in its own timing and your connection to their deep sense of fulfillment, that deep sense of feeling as if you’re on are on purpose in the right place, doing the right things with the right people will become deeply evident for you.
So rather than this pushing, forcing, striving, trying to make things happen, feeling pressure to take action, stressing about what you should or shouldn’t do, whether what you’ve done was correct or not. You just pause and you just allow life to unfold in this magical and beautiful and sometimes totally unexpected ways.
If you would prefer to listen to the audio of this blog post:
Human Design and BG5 (Human Design for Business) both bring awareness into your life. They help you sift through what you are holding onto - your shadow - and enable you to let go.
With the letting go comes the ability to embrace the truth of who you are with wide open arms.
As a guide I can help you on this journey. I can guide you to know and trust yourself.
If you are would like to explore whether Human Design or BG5 are for you, then please book in a strategy session and we can invesitage how to move you from where you are to living aligned with success.
Aliging you to success.
BG5 Business & Career, Cycles and OC16 Consultant & Human Design Guide